There are no bad children ,but only bad parents and bad teachers : that is a well-known dictum. Children in all cultures are dependent on their parents and other adults. They need a caring family and supportive environment to grow as independent adults. Children err , and err often. Traditional
wisdom suggests advice, reward, admonishment and punishment in that order to correct children. But the rationale of the punishment should be explained to them. It should never be disproportionate to the mistake. When the punishment becomes excessive, it damages the child's psyche. Some children become aggressive, while some others become timid. Failure in studies and unsuccessful career are often associated with harsh parenting during early childhood. Many children run away from their homes because of parental torture and end up as " street children" in the cities. Some children even commit suicide.
Systems Analyst Chandrasekhar and wife Anupama would never have dreamt that they would be in a Norwegian prison for disciplining(?) their seven-year old son Sai Sriram,a student of Oslo International School. It started early this year when the child complained to his teachers that his parents had threatened to send him back to India for wetting his pants. He was reported to be under treatment for Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder. The school reported the matter to the Child Welfare Service of Norway. The parents were arrested and the investigation by the Oslo Police revealed that the child was subjected to brutal abuse for the past five years: severe scolding, repeatedly beating by a belt causing scars, pressing hot spoon leading to burns on the lower leg, etc. An Oslo court sentenced the father and mother to jail terms for 18 and 15 months respectively.
Chandrasekhar's brother-in-law reacted with a sense of shock: " I have never heard anything like this. Is disciplining a child by his parents a crime?" Most Indian parents will share these sentiments as beating children is the norm in our society as parents justify beating for the good future of the children , which depends on the way the child internalizes the punishment. The punishment awarded to the Indian couple is not because of cultural misunderstanding as is made out to be because even Norwegian parents are punished for similar parenting. Parental cruelty to children are not uncommon.An Indian-origin mother in UK killed her young son by severely "beating like a dog" for not reciting passages from the Holy Book and her conviction is in the news.
In India there are no laws that specifically deal with child abuse and neglect, physical or psychological ,by parents. European laws prescribe fine to imprisonment for abusive parenting. Scandinavian countries, United States, Australia, etc. have strict child protection laws against parental abuse. Indian family, no doubt, has many strengths. But over-glorification of the Indian family values when rapid social change has been taking place will be at the cost of the well-being of our children.
wisdom suggests advice, reward, admonishment and punishment in that order to correct children. But the rationale of the punishment should be explained to them. It should never be disproportionate to the mistake. When the punishment becomes excessive, it damages the child's psyche. Some children become aggressive, while some others become timid. Failure in studies and unsuccessful career are often associated with harsh parenting during early childhood. Many children run away from their homes because of parental torture and end up as " street children" in the cities. Some children even commit suicide.
Systems Analyst Chandrasekhar and wife Anupama would never have dreamt that they would be in a Norwegian prison for disciplining(?) their seven-year old son Sai Sriram,a student of Oslo International School. It started early this year when the child complained to his teachers that his parents had threatened to send him back to India for wetting his pants. He was reported to be under treatment for Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder. The school reported the matter to the Child Welfare Service of Norway. The parents were arrested and the investigation by the Oslo Police revealed that the child was subjected to brutal abuse for the past five years: severe scolding, repeatedly beating by a belt causing scars, pressing hot spoon leading to burns on the lower leg, etc. An Oslo court sentenced the father and mother to jail terms for 18 and 15 months respectively.
Chandrasekhar's brother-in-law reacted with a sense of shock: " I have never heard anything like this. Is disciplining a child by his parents a crime?" Most Indian parents will share these sentiments as beating children is the norm in our society as parents justify beating for the good future of the children , which depends on the way the child internalizes the punishment. The punishment awarded to the Indian couple is not because of cultural misunderstanding as is made out to be because even Norwegian parents are punished for similar parenting. Parental cruelty to children are not uncommon.An Indian-origin mother in UK killed her young son by severely "beating like a dog" for not reciting passages from the Holy Book and her conviction is in the news.
In India there are no laws that specifically deal with child abuse and neglect, physical or psychological ,by parents. European laws prescribe fine to imprisonment for abusive parenting. Scandinavian countries, United States, Australia, etc. have strict child protection laws against parental abuse. Indian family, no doubt, has many strengths. But over-glorification of the Indian family values when rapid social change has been taking place will be at the cost of the well-being of our children.
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